Who are the best and worst football commentators in 2014/15?

Football commentators are responsible for being the direct link between match and TV screen, but which ones are the best and worst?

Last year I gave my top 10 best and worst commentators or co-commentators but there have been plenty of changes in football broadcasting since then so here is an updated top six for the 2014/15 season.

We’ll start with the good ones (they are a dying breed)…

  1. John Murray – BBC 5Live – new entry for 2014/15

There are plenty of people who believe that commentating on the radio is the hardest job of all because the listeners cannot see the match. What Murray does so effectively is to call a game so snappily that the listener feels as if they are watching every pass unfold. The pace with which he commentates is exciting and all the while he utters few mistakes, meaning Murray propels himself to number six on the 2014/15 list as a new entry.

  1. Martin Fisher – BBC & CBC – new entry

As someone who gets the scraps on Match of the Day, Fisher has made a name for himself as an emerging commentary talent. He is one of the more frenetic commentators but that certainly helps bring a dull game to life and, with his matches often being towards the end of the show, he manages to engage the viewers well. Gradually Fisher is being recognised as a good commentator and was rewarded when Canada’s CBC channel picked him as one of their commentators during the 2014 World Cup – a richly deserved prize.

  1. Darren Fletcher – BT Sport – new entry

As the mainstream broadcasters rested on their laurels and fell behind in popularity, BT Sport were busy cherry-picking the commentators they knew would help get their new channel off to an excellent start. Fletcher, who had previously worked for BBC Radio 5Live, has made the transition to TV look seamless with his concise, clear and precise calling of BT Sport’s handpicked Premier League matches.

  1. Gary Neville – Sky Sports – new entry

Despite being more at home as a pundit as opposed to a commentator, Gary Neville is still one of the better callers of the unseen happenings during a game with his best observations usually made on tactics and defensive positioning. What lets him down is the fact he is too patient to have his say, often waiting until the lead commentator has finished speaking or when a there is a break in play.

  1. Danny Murphy – BBC – new entry

With regular stints on Match of the Day as a pundit, few would have predicted the success that Murphy enjoyed crossing over to the co-commentator’s microphone during the World Cup. Murphy freshened up the commentary by making quick observations and crucially saying them as soon as he had the chance, rather than the usual co-commentators dithering after a TV replay. This, added to his insightful, relaxed and often humorous reading of the game has made him a valuable addition to the BBC. Let’s hope he retains his co-commentary role when the BBC host live FA Cup matches this season.

  1. Steve Wilson – BBC – up 3 places on 2013/14

If ever there was an all-rounder’s position in football commentary, Steve Wilson would fit in nice and snug. He has picked up the mantle of statistician guru from John Motson, makes very few mistakes and is a very good reader of the difficult decisions and situations in games. What Wilson does spectacularly well is to keep up with play, often meaning he is more concise. Another of his talents is to let the sound of goal celebrations do a lot of the work for him. What helps him do that is a David Coleman-like announcement of the score, such as “1-0!” All things considered, Wilson is the yardstick as the most complete commentator out there.

Now we move on to the worst commentators. You’ll never guess who’s top…

  1. Guy Mowbray – BBC – up 4 places on 2013/14

It continues to baffle me why the BBC persist with Guy Mowbray. His outdated, cliché-ridden and mistake-laden commentary is evidently good enough for the BBC as he was given the World Cup final. He has in the past wished injury on Ignazio Abate during the 2012 Euros and has been guilty of blatant sexism while commentating on women’s FA Cup matches. In mitigation he is responsible for the occasional brilliant one-liner, but his overall commentary leaves a lot to be desired.

  1. Sam Matterface – ITV & Talksport – new entry

ITV are grooming Matterface for big things, but his commentary should not have warranted a space on the World Cup airwaves this summer. His disinterested style, coupled with a knack of stating the obvious, has been boring ITV viewers ever since he came to prominence. Talksport are the other unfortunate beneficiaries of Matterface’s commentary and, when you compare him to the BBC 5Live team, you can see why he works for Talksport. Finally, this is perhaps his worst line ever: “Well here we are above Goodison where there are some lovely fluffy blue clouds.” Get the picture?

  1. Niall Quinn – Sky Sports – new entry

Quinn gets the occasional gig on Sky Sports when they have a triple-header of live games on Sunday. Some football fans would argue that that is still far too often to endure Quinn’s nightmarish co-commentary which regularly underwhelms and irritates. Offering close to no technical insight at all, Quinn is shamefully biased – particularly in matches involving Manchester City and Sunderland – two of his former clubs.

  1. Andy Townsend – ITV – same position

Along with Mowbray, the other long-term commentary mystery is Andy Townsend. Why ITV  have continued to partner him with Clive Tyldesley is unknown, but if football fans had their wish he would disappear far quicker than he could give some insightful commentary. Perhaps ITV just keep him for the publicity? Or maybe it’s the fact he chooses to sit on the fence with almost every debatable decision? Either way, it doesn’t look like Townsend and his lack of flair will be going anywhere soon.

  1. Phil Neville – BBC – new entry

With the BBC receiving 445 complaints about his commentary of England’s 2-1 defeat against Italy at the World Cup, Neville’s drab style is clearly not agreeable. He also has a hard act to follow as Gary, his brother, has been a revolutionary pundit for Sky Sports. Phil’s monotone and sleep-inducing style did not endear himself to very many people but, in fairness, he looks more at home as a pundit rather than as a co-commentator. One infamous tweet of his came after the community shield when a second-string Manchester City side were beaten 3-0 by Arsenal: “Put Aguero, Kompany, Zabaleta and Hart in this City team and they will look different.” Amen to that, Phil.

  1. Michael Owen – BT Sport – new entry

We finish on a bad note with Michael Owen. With no previous commentary experience, BT Sport elected to bring in Michael Owen as the co-commentator for their new Premier League coverage last season. That was an ignominious mistake. So bad is Owen’s commentary he often trends on Twitter when he commentates, with one of his awful lines being: “It’s a good run but it’s a poor run, if you know what I mean?”. Owen’s commentary is full of obvious conclusions, mis-pronunciations and a lack of knowledge. But the last words have to go to the man himself, who once quipped: “To stay in the game, you have to stay in the game.”

  • You can follow me on Twitter @NeilWalton89

Who are the best and worst football presenters?

The pundits and commentators have had their turn and now, in the last instalment of this three-part blog, the presenters are now in the spotlight.

Arguably the most important part of any live or recorded transmission of a football match, the presenters come under the most scrutiny, so it will be interesting to see whether you agree with my top five best and worst.

As always, I’ll begin with the best:

5. Gary Lineker, BBC

Lineker is perhaps the most prominent presenter on our screens as host of the long-running Match of the Day. He has an affable demeanour on screen and is one of just a handful of ex-players to have successfully made the transition from the pitch to the studio. Lineker rarely makes errors and delivers unbiased judgements on controversial topics – unlike some of his impulsive (and repulsive) colleagues.

4. Ray Stubbs, ESPN

A veteran of football broadcasting, ‘Stubbsy’ is well-known for his calm and engaging presenting style. His on-screen manner is such that he allows the pundits to do their work – rather than cut them off with barbed and empty opinions. Stubbs is almost flawless in his delivery and maintains a time-honoured professionalism throughout his broadcasts, making him a highly-respected football presenter.

3. Mark Pougatch, BBC 5live

It’s perhaps a shame that Pougatch is largely restricted to the airwaves (with an occasional appearance on MOTD2), because he is one of the finest presenters around. At home covering either live matches or phone-ins, Pougatch has a crisp and listenable style that has earned him plaudits from many 5live fans. The BBC would do well to promote him into the MOTD2 slot on a regular basis after Colin Murray’s departure.

2. Jeff Stelling, Sky Sports

Who doesn’t like Jeff? Animated, humorous and always worth a watch, he is the star presenter of Sky’s football coverage. He’s forged a reputation of almost legendary proportions on the hugely popular ‘Gillette Soccer Saturday’, and is also responsible for presenting live league cup games. While it’s a little mysterious that he isn’t given Premier League games on Monday Night Football, he will continue to shine on a Saturday afternoon with Messrs Merson, Thompson and Kamara.

1. James Richardson, BBC & ESPN

Something of an enigma these days, Richardson can be found presenting BBC South’s Late Kick-Off show, with seamless class. Always interesting to watch and with a unique presenting style, Richardson carved his lofty status as presenter of Channel 4’s popular Gazzetta Football Italia where he often seen filming at an Italian cafe gazing at a Gazzetta Dello Sport with an ice cream sundae. These days, his presenting of Italian football extends only to ESPN’s Serie A coverage, but he would be more than capable of presenting on Match of the Day or at other high-profile jobs.

The bad:

5. Dan Walker, BBC

Like BBC commentator Steve Bower, Walker is being groomed for the top by the Beeb. Many viewers will wonder why, when Walker has barely earned praise for his plain and naive presenting style. Currently presenting Football Focus, Walker is also heard on 5live irritating listeners with an over-friendly and boyish approach. Has the potential to be a top presenter, but his sudden rise has raised a few eyebrows – perhaps he’s seen as a natural replacement for Jake Humphrey?

4. Colin Murray, BBC

Too chummy with fellow colleagues, possessor of an annoying voice and user of tumbleweed gags – just a few reasons why Colin Murray should take his rightful place on the list of bad presenters. It seems the BBC agrees, with Murray being demoted from the hot seat on Match of the Day 2 to his everyday radio commitments from the 2013/14 season onwards.

3. Matt Smith, ITV

Matt…Smith…has…a…very…distinct…style. If you hadn’t already guessed from my sarcasm, Smith has a strong and irritating fondness for the artistic pause. In fact, his pausing is so obvious you can pretty much predict what he’s going to say before he’s even said it. Despite this, his presenting is largely undramatic and mostly error-free, although many critics have pointed out that his knowledge of the game is lacking in some departments. If he were to iron out the pauses he wouldn’t be on this list.

2. Mark Chapman, BBC

There’s not much that Mark Chapman cannot do when it comes to annoying football fans. Blessed with a voice more akin to that of the Milkybar kid than a front-line football presenter, he is guilty of a series of uninspiring presenting displays. Some elements of Chapman’s presenting are fine – including his thorough knowledge of the game – but he lets himself down with some glaring errors and, like Murray, is often too chummy with pundits on-screen – notably Robbie Savage. With Chapman at the helm, it’s not difficult to see why Final Score looks amateurish in comparison to Soccer Saturday.

1. Adrian Chiles, ITV

Don’t get me wrong, I find Chiles’ sense of humour fairly inoffensive having been brought up by and spent time with several Midlanders in my life, but for the majority of football fans he infuriates rather than delights. Twitter is always a hazardous place for football presenters, but the horrific abuse Chiles gets from fans on the social networking site is sometimes unbelievable. That said, criticisms are not without justice, mainly due to his proneness to big gaffes and his dour, dead-pan style. His most recent error, and perhaps the most amusing, was when he left his backpack on the ITV sofa during the half-time break of the Brazil vs England game. When ITV came back on air, his backpack was in full view. While this is mainly his fault, the ITV producers should also be criticised for not noticing. ITV really could, and should, do better.

Who are the best and worst football commentators?

Football commentators. The people armchair viewers love to hate.

There are plenty of atrocious and infuriating callers of the beautiful game out there, and also a handful of brilliant ones, but who makes my top 10 best and worst?

And before anyone pipes up about Andy Townsend, I’ve included co-commentators in the list too!

Let’s start with the good first:

10. Mike Ingham, BBC 5Live

Ingham is an entertaining commentator for those of you who are avid 5live listeners. Hardly ever culpable of making a mistake, he blends an enthusiastic commentary style with a thorough knowledge of the game. More importantly, he puts his 5live colleagues to shame.

9. Simon Brotherton, BBC

Brotherton is without doubt one of the BBC’s most underrated commentators. Experienced and articulate, he calls some of the biggest games on the Premier League calendar for Match of the Day with great success. Like Ingham, he hardly makes a mistake and is definitely worthy of a place on this countdown.

8. Clive Tyldesley, ITV

I’ve been known to call Tyldesley ‘Alive Clive’ due to his excitable style (he often sounds like a Dalek too), but generally he is a very capable commentator. His greatest work for ITV is probably the 1999 Champions League final, but can be prone to some occasional errors too. He gets bonus points for sitting next to Andy Townsend for two hours.

7. Rob Hawthorne, Sky Sports

Hawthorne is part of Sky’s respected commentary line-up, and has often called some high-profile matches. Not least the memorable Manchester derby where United’s Michael Owen snatched a 96th-minute winner in a 4-3 win. Looking back at Hawthorne’s commentary for that match on YouTube, it’s safe to say he did a fantastic job.

6. Jon Champion, ESPN

Perhaps the most respected commentator in the media, Champion is vastly experienced having worked for the BBC, ITV and most recently ESPN. His commentary of Owen’s wondergoal against Argentina at the 1998 World Cup will forever live in the memory of England fans.

5. Peter Drury, ITV & Fox Soccer

Often unfairly dubbed ‘Peter Dreary’, Drury is a well-spoken and entertaining commentator. He has a remarkable knowledge of the game and thrives in the big moments during the biggest games. Arguably his most thrilling work was during last season’s Manchester City 3-2 QPR match for Fox Soccer, where Sergio Aguero scored a late title-clinching winner for City.

4. Steve Wilson, BBC

Wilson has often been overlooked for the biggest games on Match of the Day in favour of the much-maligned Guy Mowbray, but his commentary style is perhaps the clearest of them all. He has the ability to keep up with play using quick, engaging and efficient language, and rarely makes mistakes.

3. Martin Tyler, Sky Sports

Head honcho of Sky’s commentary team, Tyler’s career has spanned across numerous eras of football. Usually understated and reserving his enthusiasm for the biggest Premier League and European games, Tyler’s most famous piece of commentary came in Manchester United’s 3-2 win over Aston Villa in 2009, where 17-year-old Federico “Machedaaaaaa!” scored a last-gasp winner.

2. John Motson, BBC

“Motty” is the godfather of commentary. Having retired from calling the action at international tournaments, Motson typically covers games in London for Match of the Day. He is nudged down from the top spot due to what many critics have correctly said about his increasingly frail and error-laden commentary – but that should not detract from the 67-year-old’s marvellous career.

1. Jonathan Pearce, BBC

Pearce beats his famed BBC colleague to top spot by virtue of some memorable and flawless commentary. Without doubt the BBC’s finest live commentator, some of the most enjoyable work in his career came in 2001 during England’s 5-1 ‘Müllering’ of Germany in Munich, where he worked for Capital Gold Sport. The line “England have gone naff in Germany!” was just one of many gems that night.

And now, the bad (and in Mark Lawrenson’s case, the ugly):

10. Guy Mowbray, BBC

It is baffling to many armchair and pub viewers alike why Guy Mowbray continues to be awarded the biggest gigs in football commentary. He cannot bring himself to make a definitive judgement on many controversial incidents and he is usually off the pace with his languid and dull style. He should be afforded some respite from his many critics for his famous “Agueroooooooo” line in the climax to the 2011-12 Premier League season.

9. Chris Waddle, ESPN

Waddle is not shy of making criticisms of current players, but when you are responsible for one of the most painful moments in English football history, you can hardly hide. Alongside Champion at ESPN, he has a tendency to state the obvious and offers tired, useless analysis of live matches.

8. Alan Green, BBC 5Live

Green is another opinionated commentator who has drawn criticism from far and wide. His style is actually listenable and articulate, but he lets himself down by hovering over his criticisms of players for too long – often to the detriment of his output.

7. Robbie Savage, BBC 5Live

Savage has cultivated a punditry career seemingly out of thin air. He certainly uses up a lot of air too, with his frenzied commentary style for 5Live, and offers little or no original analysis. He has also become the voice of 5Live’s 606, which is the perfect place for his dim comments to be hidden amongst others.

6. Craig Burley, ESPN

One of the more enjoyable co-commentators on the list, Burley gets onto the bad side due to his unprofessional nature. He is often guilty of bullying Champion during live matches and, given Champion’s well-respected and insightful commentary, his obvious misplaced dislike for his colleague makes him appear in a bad light.

5. Steve Bower, BBC

Currently being groomed by the BBC for a commentary place in football’s biggest arenas, Bower is unworthy of such a privilege. He rarely gets enthused by big moments in matches and has a distinctly monotone style which feels out of place on Match of the Day.

4. Martin Keown, BBC

Making the grade for the BBC’s Euro 2012 coverage, Keown should count himself lucky that the Beeb ignore the hundreds of tweets about his commentary every time he picks up a co-commentators mic. Littering his calls with errors, mispronunciation and recycled clichés, Keown’s commentary is every bit as cringeworthy as his punditry.

3. Andy Townsend, ITV

There are few plastic Irishmen in this world, and if they are all like Andy Townsend, I hope none of them get a commentary job in their lives. Constantly stating the obvious, Townsend’s only redeeming feature is that he is not afraid to say if a player is offside, rather than the usual “it’s marginal” sitting-on-the-fence attitude.

2. Mark Lawrenson, BBC

“Lawro”, or rather, ‘LOL-o’ is prone to making awful puns and jokes during live commentary for the BBC. A fond wearer of revolting shirts and a model of the balding mullet, a tirade of abuse was directed his way during the Euro 2012 final for what the Twittersphere correctly perceived to be an abhorrent lesson in commentary. That he was partnered with Mowbray for the same match caused many viewers to switch over to ITV or Flog It on BBC2.

1. Mark Bright, BBC

I have no doubt that ‘Brighty’ is a nice enough bloke, but his commentary is useless. He deflates rather than inspires, confuses rather than enlightens and, more importantly, bores rather than delights. It is perhaps testament to the dearth of co-commentating depth-in-strength possessed by the BBC that Bright continues to journey to World Cups and European Championships. Bright is the strongest reason to ditch ex-player co-commentators, but if we didn’t have them, over half of this list would be null and void and I would not be blogging. So thanks Mark, it appears you do have a use after all.

Vettel vs. Webber – A volcanic F1 rivalry

Sebastian Vettel and Mark Webber have long been intense rivals at world champions Red Bull, but now it seems Formula One’s most high-profile rivalry has erupted again after a spell of dormancy.

As with most volcanic activity there is heat, poisonous smoke, and a history of violent eruptions – a perfect metaphor for the Vettel/Webber rivalry.

The compelling Malaysian Grand Prix was the latest explosion where Vettel, who was mindful of the 25-point advantage he would gain over title rival Fernando Alonso following the Spaniard’s early retirement, overtook Webber in a gripping wheel-to-wheel contest with just over ten laps remaining.

Webber had twice been assured by the team that the win was his. This resulted after a team meeting on race day which stipulated that the driver in front after the final pit stop would pull rank over the other. Vettel seemingly ignored that discussion.

Instead he showed a hunger which threatened to destroy the team’s 1-2 position in the race to pass Webber for the victory and incur the wrath of the Australian and, on the surface at least, his team.

The fight between them has intensified in recent seasons, as reigning world champion Vettel has romped to three consecutive drivers’ titles with Red Bull claiming successive constructors’ crowns in the same period.

It is, without question, the German’s team – and how Webber detests that fact.

Red Bull veteran Webber and Vettel first clashed when the then 20-year-old German, driving for sister team Toro Rosso in his debut season in F1, smashed into the Australian under safety car conditions in the 2007 Japanese Grand Prix at Fuji.

Webber had been second at the time with Red Bull (a small team back then) primed for a hugely valuable podium.

Vettel was third in his slower Toro Rosso in monsoon-like conditions, and was caught out by leader Lewis Hamilton’s erratic driving behind the safety car, embarrassingly clouting Webber from behind and ending both their races.

It prompted Webber to say in a post-race interview to ITV that, “It’s kids isn’t it, kids with not enough experience. You do a good job and then they fuck it all up.”

The straight-talking Webber later criticised Hamilton, also in his debut season, for his “shit” driving behind the safety car.

Webber was hurt by the incident, and three years later those old wounds were to be opened again – in even more dramatic fashion.

Now team-mates at Red Bull, Webber and Vettel were pushing hard for a win in the 2010 Turkish GP under increasing pressure from the McLaren duo of Hamilton and Jenson Button.

With Vettel getting a tow on the long back straight he swept to the left of Webber, drew alongside and then veered across him before the braking phase into the following hairpin, causing a high-speed crash which punctured his tyre and forced Webber to stop for a new front wing.

The gleeful McLarens took a straightforward 1-2 while Webber took third with Vettel retiring from the race with irreparable damage. Team boss Christian Horner and chief designer Adrian Newey were in utter despair after that inter-team crash, but another incident was shortly in the offing.

In trying to reassure Webber that Vettel was not their favoured driver, Red Bull gave the Australian an updated front wing for the British GP later in the season.

Only one model of the front wing was built but, when Vettel damaged his old-spec wing, Red Bull took the decision to take it off Webber’s car and give it to Vettel.

It was a call that served to infuriate the Australian, but he would have the last laugh as he romped to a superb victory before relaying the infamous “not bad for a number two driver” message to his team on the cool-down lap.

The spotlight was firmly on the duo’s battle and in the season-ending race in Abu Dhabi the conspiracy theorists were again out in force.

Webber entered the race behind leader Alonso in the standings, with Vettel in fourth and also within reach of the title, but he had qualified poorly and showed a lack of race pace.

Red Bull decided to use the slow Webber as a decoy to fool Alonso’s Ferrari team into covering his every move – and after a tactical pit stop they resumed in traffic on a track with notorious overtaking difficulties.

Vettel sailed off into the distance and took the title from Alonso – and Webber.

Few could have argued that Red Bull had nailed Vettel’s colours to its mast that season, and the old war resurfaced in the 2011 British GP when Webber, eagerly chasing the German down, was told to “maintain the gap” to Vettel in second.

Webber ignored those veiled orders, in much the same way as Vettel did today, and continued to race his colleague to the final lap.

By now the Australian seemed determined to race for himself, utterly disgusted by Red Bull’s favouritism towards Vettel beneath their public affirmations of neutrality.

Vettel went on to take the title with four races remaining, and later took his third drivers’ crown at Brazil in 2012 – but with little help from Webber.

Vettel collided with Bruno Senna on the first lap and worked his way up to take sixth – a position good enough to deny Alonso the title – but later said that Webber did little to help him.

It has been alleged that the incident in Malaysia today was revenge for that perceived lack of help, but the fact remains that Webber has backed off at the team’s behest to conserve Vettel’s superior racing positions on numerous occasions over the past few seasons.

With Webber’s past obedience to such orders in mind, Vettel’s overtake will sicken Webber further.

Will the Australian enter into a similar situation with no trust of his team-mate and look for retaliation? Will their rivalry spiral into another catastrophic crash? And can Red Bull regain control and authority over their drivers?

All these questions remain unanswered, but for now the focus will be on Formula One’s most captivating rivalry and the tremors that will continue to rumble from Mt. Red Bull in the coming weeks.

Who are the best and worst football pundits?

In the UK, we have four television channels that regularly screen live football matches or highlights – and each of them has a mixture of good and bad pundits.

One question remains though. Who are they? Let’s take a look.

The Good

5. Mick McCarthy, ex-BBC

The entertaining Yorkshireman has a no-nonsense attitude on screen and on the sidelines. Currently manager of Ipswich Town, McCarthy started off the season with a stint on Match of the Day 2, to acclaim from the footballing world.

His accessible knowledge of the game was fascinatingly displayed with some incisive and to-the-point analysis. The fact that he gets player’s names correct, and does not bore people to sleep, also helps.

4. Pat Nevin, 5Live & ITV4

The likeable Scot is mostly heard on our radio stations, but occasionally he is afforded a place on our TV screens – somewhere he should be more regularly.

Nevin’s accurate analysis, particularly in the Europa League, and his neutral take on games, provide viewers with a balanced and informative reading of the beautiful game.

3. Lee Dixon, ITV

A surprise selection perhaps, Dixon is noted for his fair and accurate punditry. Being a Manchester City fan and a former Arsenal right-back, Dixon manages to assess fixtures in an unbiased manner.

With his excellent analysis of defensive situations, and an affable on-screen personality, Dixon gets a place in my top three pundits.

2. Kevin Keegan, ESPN

Also a controversial choice on face value, Keegan has established himself as ESPN’s lead pundit.

Despite his challenging opinions, Keegan has a habit of spotting things other pundits miss.

This makes him a more accurate pundit and this, together with his knowledge of the game and engaging personality, makes him a good watch.

1. Gary Neville, Sky Sports

Said to have taken punditry to a new level, Neville is enjoying an unprecedented level of respect amongst the footballing community for his detailed and insightful analysis.

In his element on Sky’s Monday Night Football, Neville has a touchscreen TV at his disposal, and he uses it to maximum effect by offering viewers a state-of-the-art insight into the mechanics of a football match.

Having also taken his punditry into the commentary position alongside Martin Tyler, Neville is arguably the UK’s stand-out football expert.

The Bad

5. Mark Lawrenson, BBC

It’s hard to like Lawro. If his shirts are horrendous, his punditry is even worse.

Lawrenson’s chummy relationship with Gary Lineker and Alan Shearer on MOTD is another bug-bear, and he offers little originality or decisiveness – on his predictions column on the BBC Sport website he invariably predicts 1-1 whenever the top Premier League teams clash.

The ex-Liverpool defender also turns his hand to commentary for major tournaments – frustratingly so. His sense of humour (call me hypocritical) is annoying, and he never seems to fail in making matches less appealing. Worth his place in the worst five.

4. Steve Claridge, BBC

Perhaps the most boring of all pundits on TV, Claridge has the ability to do little else but annoy. His knowledge of league football on the Football League Show is hardly inspiring, and can sometimes detract from the generally exciting matches on show.

Also a radio pundit on 5Live, Claridge is just as underwhelming, often stating the obvious and hiding behind the lead commentator.

3. Gareth Southgate, ITV

Having been out of the managerial hotseat for almost three-and-a-half years, Southgate has been filling a punditry position on ITV while he continues to look for a new job.

That job can’t come quick enough, with Southgate being one of the drabbest pundits around.

His ability to emulate Claridge and state the obvious is accentuated by his lack of insight.

Southgate is also culpable of forgetting player’s names and is sometimes picked on by his more assertive colleagues – notably Roy Keane.

2. Robbie Savage, BBC & 5Live

Aside from his irritating on-screen demeanour, Savage’s opinionated punditry is often inaccurate.

His biggest flaw though, is picking up on something and referring to it in unwavering fashion throughout the match – particularly on 5Live.

This is evidenced by his recent barrage of criticism towards Rafael da Silva in the Champions League last week, accusing the Brazilian of not trying hard enough to contain Cristiano Ronaldo – the fact is, who can?

It was widely held in the national papers on Thursday that Rafael actually had a decent game, unbeknownst to Savage.

This fascination with such observations leaves his punditry with a serious case of ‘tunnel vision’ – one which we could all do without.

1. Martin Keown, BBC & ESPN

Easily the worst pundit on our screens.

The former Arsenal defender had a formidable reputation on the pitch, and is now building one in the studio for all the wrong reasons.

Guilty of making embarrassing gaffes, mispronouncing names and using laughable cliches, Keown’s dour punditry is now being exposed.

Always frowning and fond of making a blind-alley point to round off a discussion, Keown should count himself lucky that both ESPN and the BBC see him as indispensable.